Mascot Madness

By John Meng      Nothing is sacred today. Radical liberal factions in our country are attempting to defile and erase our American history. George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Christopher Columbus, Abraham Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt...the list of historical icons to be expunged goes on and on.     

But it’s not just the key political figures in our history that are under fire. Now, they are targeting our sports mascots. Enough! Say what you want about Columbus, but leave our sports teams alone!     

The Washington Redskins have been the most notable in the headlines. But it didn’t start with the Redskins and it won’t stop with them either. Let’s not forget George Washington University rebranded its ‘George the Colonial’ mascot (i.e. colonialism is racist) and the University of Notre Dame’s Fighting Irish mascot is under siege for...you guessed it...leprechauns are racist.     

The Texas Rangers baseball team are also now in the strike zone. According to a Washington Post column that was quickly spread by the mainstream media, the Texas Rangers – which were in formed in 1835 as the territory’s only law enforcement to protect settlers on the frontier – were not a force for good. Instead, the author writes the “Rangers were a cruel, racist force” and the team’s name is “not far off from being called the Texas Klansmen.”     

Have we reached our crazy quotient yet?     

Luckily, high school mascots have not been a favorite target of the ‘tear-down-everything-American’ crowd, and that’s probably because high schools don’t provide the high-profile publicity and media attention that these radicals want.

Nevertheless, Jackson County mascots are ripe for criticism by the super-sensitive, sanctimonious snowflakes that claim to be offended by everything that does not fit their rose-colored, antiseptic, politically correct world.     

Let’s start with the obvious one. The Ganado Indians.     

Better circle the wagons because Indian mascots everywhere are under attack. Shortly after the Washington Redskins said they would retire their name and logo,  the Cleveland Indians issued a statement indicating they will perform a review of its franchise nickname.     

But who is really offended by a team name? The Washington Post published a poll a couple of years ago that found nine in 10 Native Americans were not offended by the name of Washington Redskins.             

Washington’s logo has been an Indian chief since 1971. It was designed by Native American Walter ‘Blackie’ Wetzel to depict a member of the Blackfeet tribe. According to Wetzel’s son, Lance, the logo is not offensive, but rather evokes a sense of pride.  

In fact, many Native Americas have defended the ‘Indian’ mascots. In one op-ed letter to Indianz.com, the author stated, “Being of Native American descent, I love it that sports teams honor me and my ancestors by naming themselves after our proud people. How thrilling it is to hear names such as Warriors, Braves, Redskins, Chiefs and Indians! There are those who desperately want us to be offended so they can make us less than human. We’re attacked by liberal traitors who want to remove our memory to satisfy their allegiance to political correctness, forgetting us in their ambition to join the crowd and be nominally accepted, cowering before these flattering, unholy activists and trying to influence us to be one of them.”     

But the actual opinion of true Native Americans doesn’t matter to the liberal chest-beaters. They want Indian mascots gone because they think it should be offensive to people.     

Then, we have the Edna Cowboys. I grew up watching John Wayne, Randolph Scott and  James Arness. So, I love Westerns and I guess that makes me offensive. But the liberals don’t see Cowboys as American icons, or as good guys from a simpler time.     

To the liberal mindless minions, Cowboys are uneducated blue-collar workers who don’t bathe regularly, use tobacco, drink whiskey, smell like horses and cattle, patronize brothels, kill Indians, sleep with boots on, and use violence to settle personal disputes in the middle of the street. Cowboys are little more than Neanderthals and are not good role models for our children. Thus, the Cowboy mascot must go.     

Finally, there are the Industrial Cobras.     

Well, I openly admit that I hate snakes. So, a radical liberal might claim that snakes, which are scary and repulsive to many Americans, is an offensive mascot. After all, a snake was partly responsible for casting Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden (I’m not completely discounting Eve’s role in that). Cobras are also venomous which encourages the use of poison and that’s a bad influence on children.     

And, let’s not forget the snake’s full moniker of ‘King Cobra.’ A king? America shed itself of idolizing royalty back in 1776, so Cobras as a mascot is unacceptable.     

Of course, this is all Leftwing lunacy and we can only hope it receives its own expungement on Nov. 3rd.     

Go Cowboys! Go Indians!  Go Cobras!